Have you ever looked at someone oozing with confidence and wondered where they’re getting all this confidence from?
If only I had half of her confidence.
Do you often feel that there’s an inner critic in you telling that you’re not enough and capable of achieving this or that?
As we are flooded by these extrinsic and intrinsic factors that threaten our self confidence, it’s important that we take small steps to break down these barriers and slowly feel confident about ourselves again.
Here are 10 little things for you to build up your self confidence!
1. Set Small Goals
If you’re short on confidence, you need more accomplishments. Each time you check a thing out of your to-do list, you’ll feel fulfilled. Your brain will thus secrete a hormone called dopamine – which is the reward hormone.
Activating the reward centers in your brain makes you feel intense pleasure, which you’ll want constantly. As such, you will continue your road to achievement, which in turn builds confidence.
On the other hand, if you don’t seem to get anything done, you might become depressed.
If you feel like you can’t tackle anything big, start with the little things. Confident, accomplished people start by making their beds each morning because that’s a neat trick to play on your brain to make it release more dopamine.
But that’s just an example. Put small, attainable goals on your to-do list such as reading ten pages each day, instead of writing “land a job in a successful firm” on your list.
2. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness isn’t the newest fad in the world of Zen wannabes who say “meditation” at least ten times per minute. Mindfulness is a science rooted in neurology and psychology.
Lack of confidence is connected to fear. Fear that you’re not good enough fear that the world is against you.
Mindfulness helps identify your triggers and recognize the physical sensations associated with this fear.
This helps you objectively assess whether you’re up for a job, or if it’s just the fear talking. And when you overcome this anxiety, you will feel liberated.
3. Do What’s Right
If you don’t trust yourself to make important decisions or take significant actions, it might be because of a lax value system.
Confident people seem to know exactly what to do, and that’s mostly because they have a strong moral compass.
As such, you need to improve yourself and be your best version. Make sure all your actions follow the greater good, not just petty, short-term interests.
Doing this helps you overcome decision-related stress, depression, and anxiety, and you’ll feel strong and helpful.
Exercise releases endorphins, serotonin, and dopamine, activating the pleasure and happiness centers in your brain. It is a good way to avoid stress and depression and bring more oxygen to your brain.
As such, your memory, focus, and mental clarity will be improved, you’ll feel more rested, and you’ll discover a new array of abilities that can increase your confidence.
Besides, exercise requires effort and diligence in attaining goals, so you’ll also feel more accomplished.
5. Change Your Perspective
Low confidence stems from low self-esteem. If you think other people have a poor opinion about you, your confidence plummets.
So work on changing your perspective. Maybe your coworkers didn’t ignore your ideas at the meeting; maybe they just didn’t hear you. Or maybe your friends aren’t ignoring you; maybe they simply have a lot on their mind.
Instead of finding fault in yourself, try to think objectively and ask questions. Most often, you will be reassured, and you will be able to interpret reality sensibly.
6. Don’t Let Yourself Be Bullied
Bullies decrease your confidence because they play at your biggest fears.
Whether you’re self-conscious about your weight, clothing choices, or knowledge, a bully out there will exploit these doubts. Needless to say, this can bring you on the brink of depression or cause extreme anxiety.
It helps to understand why the bully constantly tries to corner you and, often, it’s because they also feel unsure or have their own past traumas.
So next time your bully comes at you, stand up to them. Unravel their own fears, give them an emotional speech or pick up their “joke” if it seems harmless enough.
Once you have conquered your bully, you’ll then feel brave and confident.
7. Be Constant
Following through with your promises, deadlines, and objectives make other people respect and trust you. But what’s more important is that you will respect yourself more.
If you’re constantly being told you’re not dependable, you will start acting like it, which decreases your confidence.
But if you do what you promise, and other people trust you more, you will have better relationships.
In turn, this activates your brain’s reward and pleasure centers. People with close ties in their community are happier and more confident because they know they’re needed and that they have people to count on.
8. Learn Delayed Gratification
You may be less confident because others have more things or more accomplishments. This all boils down to delayed gratification, which means to postpone your short-term pleasure for a bigger satisfaction in the future.
If you want a new car, you need to save money instead of spending it on eating out each night. If you want to lose weight, you need to keep track of your calories instead of indulging in sweets and fast-food.
In the majority of cases, working hard towards a goal makes you achieve it. But even if you don’t achieve it, your confidence will still get a big boost because you will know what it means to work hard for the things you want, and you will learn to appreciate others instead of being jealous of them.
9. Listen To Others, But Don’t Let Them Bring You Down
Sometimes, you will receive negative feedback from people, which brings your confidence down, especially if they’re close to you.
You might not even know what stings most: when they’re right or when they’re wrong.
It’s always good to listen to advice but ask for constructive criticism instead of hurtful negative remarks. Once you have your feedback, you can make an objective pros-and-cons list to draw your conclusion.
This approach helps you think analytically, so you’ll always feel at peace about making an informed decision, instead of blaming yourself later.
10. Do Things That Make You Happy
Make time for yourself and your passions. This helps you stay connected to your true self so you can understand and appreciate yourself. That way, you can increase your self-esteem, which is the cornerstone of your confidence.
Besides, time to yourself brings up your happiness hormones. That way, you won’t be as affected by hurtful remarks or bullies, and you will have more energy to manage difficult situations.
Those with low self confidence often feel that others are more deserving of things than them. It’s important to lay this notion to rest and know that all things being equal, no one is less deserving of something than the other. It’s only after doing so will you see an increase in your self confidence.